Debra’s Celebration of Life Service

Debra Anne Kent-Dreyer August 19th, 1963— February 26th, 2009

Debra’s service was held on March 8th, 2009 at the Unity North Atlanta church. Debra’s life celebration service was everything she would have wanted and was a true celebration of her wonderful life. As a final post to Deb’s Journal, I have uploaded the audio recordings, all photos from the picture boards and other information from the service for all to know the story of this amazing and beautiful woman that touched so many of our lives.

For each section below, click the audio icon to listen to each section of service. Audio files are formatted as “mp3” files and can be played with most media players.

“The Secret of Life”
Penelope Williams
Audio Song

Welcome
The 23rd Psalm
Rev. Nancy Worth
Audio

Opening Prayer “The Lord’s Prayer”
Penelope Williams
Bill Barbuto
Audio Song

“The Prophet “ - On Death
by Kahlil Gibran
Rev. Nancy Worth
Audio

Words of Comfort and Eulogy
Barbara, Susan, Rod
Nancy Worth, Introduction
Barbara Wischmann, A Best Friend and Teacher
Susan Kent, Debra’s Little Sister
Rod Dreyer, Debra’s Husband and Soul mate

Words of Remembrance
Family and Friends
Audio

“Imagine”
Penelope Williams
Bill Barbuto
Audio Song

“The Traveler“ by James Dillet Freeman
Inspiration and Meditation
Words of Farewell
Closing Prayer
“Miss Me, But Let Me Go”
Rev. Nancy Worth
Audio

“Peace Song”
Penelope Williams
Audio Song

Rev. Nancy Worth, Senior Minister
Rev. Penelope Williams, Minister of Music

Debra’s Celebration of Life Pictures
Debra’s life celebration continued with a life of pictures to give you a great perspective of the full life that Deb lived from her early days to all of her adventures.

For each section, click the View Full Album to view Debra’s life pictures.

The Early Years

View Full Album


College and Fun

View Full Album


Marriage and Family

View Full Album

Friends and Adventures

View Full Album

Thank you for helping us celebrate Debra’s life
At 45, she was young and physically beautiful. She moved with a regal grace and ease developed very early as a ballet dancer and gymnast. She lived her life with great love, peace, discipline and joy. She was a soul mate to her husband, Rod and a loving and passionate mother to Taylor and Tommy. She touched so many people as a teacher, friend, dog lover, traveler, walker and reader. She was a powerful advocate for her students and their families. She was often described as “having such a light inside.” Her presence and beauty were compelling. Any experience was special because she was there.

Debra was diagnosed with cancer in July 2008. She inherited the same cancer that ended her father’s life when she was 17yo. Her illness saved the life of her sister , Susan, who has now been successfully treated after finding that she also, was positive for the same type of cancer. Her illness also prompted her brother, Stephen, to seek out the critical early diagnostic tests that he is currently undergoing.

One thing that has made her illness less stressful has been the support she has received from the Keheley Elementary school family and the community at Highland Ridge. They have provided food on a regular basis for the family for MONTHS. Such a prolonged show of love and tenderness has made our family rethink the way we will be in the future with others in crisis. The things we do for those in need makes the pain bearable. It, in the end , is really the only thing that is important. It is what goes on.

I believe she was a way shower for all of us who loved her. She loved to have fun and looked inside for guidance when making decisions. She was quick to focus on “priorities.” Family, friends, love, fun, teaching, reading, walking with dogs and ‘standing up for what you believe’ guided her day.

Thank you Debra for being a role model for how we might focus our day.

Connie Oden, Deb's Beautiful Aunt, Sister and Soulmate at heart

Coming Before Me
I look at her across the street.
Standing with her grown up friends and her grown up ways.

Her bus comes first and she rides by to the big school.
Memory is yellow, red, green, remembered bright.

She’s always riding by me, getting on before me, grown up.

I see her older now.
Taking care of me through a time I didn’t understand,
and that she understood all too well.
Everything remembered is blue and grey then, remembered dark.

She’s always older, understanding first, remember.

Today I see her, older still.
A mother now herself. Using all that she knows, all that she is. Memories to be made in yellow, red, blue, grey; clear and bright.

She’s always growing, making memories, coming before me.

And there’s comfort there. In her
coming first going before me,
clearing the way.
All grown up, yet still a way to go.

Susan C. Kent, August 20th, 1992
Susan wrote this for Deb 3 days after our first son Taylor was born on August 17th, 1992.




Florida Keys, June 2008

Our family will forever be grateful to each and every one of you for your incredible
compassion, kindness and love for our beautiful Debra Dreyer.
Rod Dreyer

Thank you to everyone for your help and prayers. My mom will forever be remembered..
Taylor Dreyer

I want to thank all of my dearest friends and family for supporting us in these challenging times. I won’t deny how hard it has been, but my mother left us in peace. My sincerest thank you to everyone.
Tommy Dreyer

Deb’s Beautiful Wings

(See below. Updated 03/01/2009 with service arrangements.)

All of us are at peace now that she has earned her angel wings. Deb was with her family/friends all day yesterday comforting her as she continued to lose strength. I got to sleep with her last night with her bed next to mine holding her precious hand as we slept. It was just a few minutes before midnight of Thursday (02/26/09) when our beautiful Deb took her last breath while in the total comfort of our wonderful home. She was so peaceful and we all took great comfort in knowing that she acknowledged that we loved her dearly and was ok for her to move on because all her loved ones were going to be ok.

It has been 7 months to this day and we are all comforted to know that we did all that we set out to do with Deb’s journey. Deb you have made the journey so easy for all of us to care for you.

Our heartfelt thank you goes out to all of you. You have been part of an incredible team of loving support that got us this far thru Deb’s challenging journey. We will never forget.

Life Celebration Service
Deb’s life celebration service will be at the Unity North church in Marietta, Georgia.

Date / Time: March 8th, 2009, 3pm est
Unity North
4255 Sandy Plains Rd.
Marietta, Georgia 30066
Web: http://www.unitynorth.org/
Directions: http://www.unitynorth.org/directions.php

Accommodations
For out of town guests, see below for two of hotels within 6 miles of the church.

Comfort Suites
340 Parkway 575, Woodstock, Georgia 30188
Phone: 770-517-9650
Web: http://www.comfortsuiteswoodstock.net/

Hampton Inn
450 Parkway 575, Woodstock, Georgia 30188
Phone: 770-592-2323

In Lieu of Flowers
Because one of Deb’s greatest joys in life was her love for books, we would graciously ask that if you wanted to send flowers to instead submit donation to Deb’s school library at Keheley Elementary where she taught for over 15 years. Deb had a true gift of teaching her students to read and I think she would love to know that she was giving something back to the Keheley library for all students to enjoy. Please make checks payable to Keheley Elementary School and in the note line write Debra Dreyer Memorial. Donations may be mailed to the school at 1985 Kemp Rd., Marietta, GA 30066.

Sadly, we also lost our wonderful dog Saint Casey today. Deb I know you and Casey are walking thru the pearly gates with the warmest smiles looking down on us all.

Deb, you have been an extraordinary wife, mother, and friend. We love you so much Deb and we miss you already.

Love to all,
Rod

I had your love I had it all
Celine Dion

Valentine’s Day

Much love surrounded Deb on V Day from her mom Bonnie, sister Susan, Ellen, aunt Connie, cousin Brynda and the Dreyer boys. The cards, balloon and beautiful tulips/roses were all icing on the cake for Deb’s room. Thank you Mom and Dad for the roses and Ann for the tulips. They brought a warm smile to Deb’s face.

We have added a reclining bed to our room for Deb. Connie had a great idea about putting the bed next to the window so Deb can look out to see the trees which are now starting to bloom. In addition, she also suggested adding a bird feeder outside the window. It just so happens that there is a big tree next to our house with a branch extending out near Deb’s new bed window where a bird feeder will work out perfect for the boys to hang out there for their mom. Connie you continue to amaze us with your life experiences and you are one of Deb’s most precious life angels :)

In continuation from my last entry, this post is not any easier to write to everyone but I know we are ALL in this together with Deb. I am so sorry to write that Deb continues to lose strength daily even though she is keeping up her appetite ok. Her confusion level is increasing but she continues to be very aware of everyone around her. It is obvious that she knows what she wants to say but she struggles to get her words to come out in the right order. She can no longer walk on her own but just know that she continues to be in much loved hands daily. I am taking turns with Susan working from the house this week to be with Deb and give Bonnie a much needed break.

On behalf of all of Deb's life angels out there, please know that we continue to share your prayers, strength and love daily to Deb.

KTS and love to all,
Rod

Imagine all the people Living life in peace
John Lennon

Deb’s Life Angels & Home sweet home

Dr. Yaffe called me back last Friday to check on Deb and also to go over the follow up MRI and CT Scan results from January. Deb’s abdominal CTScan showed overall but not significant tumor reduction in right and left liver lobes as a result of chemoembolization treatments in Nov-Dec 2008. MRI neck and back results were normal with no issues found. Deb’s MRI brain still showed the small mass on her left lobe that appeared on last MRI in December that we hoped was a result of falling out of her bed at Northside. Even though it has only been a month since last brain MRI, the brain mass has not decreased in size and shows additional swelling around the outer edges of mass. At this point, it would require a biopsy to truly identify if it is a hematoma or tumor metastasis related to Deb’s other cancer. What makes this suspect to mets is that MEN1 neuroendocrine is usually slow growing and does normally metastasize to the brain. Regardless, Dr. Yaffe agrees that we cannot move forward with any other testing of the brain, etc.. until Deb is strong enough so the family is on our current “day to day” rebuilding of our Deb. Will do another checkpoint with Dr. Yaffe in early March if Deb’s condition improves.
The hardest part of sharing Deb’s journal is having to share news that is not positive in nature because Deb always has lived with loving and positive energies surrounding around her. It is my role as part of Deb’s journey to keep all Deb’s Life Angels out there current so you continue to feel connected to Deb no matter where you are in this wonderful world. Deb’s mom Bonnie has been with us since after Christmas since Deb has not been strong enough to be by herself while I am at work. Bonnie continues to shine in her wonderful and effortless motherly care for her daughter.

It is with sadness but endless family strength that I share to all that Deb and rest of our family have agreed two weeks ago to seek assistance with home health care for Deb. Deb’s newest team of life angels consist of a home nurse, aide, social worker, and chaplain that are all just a phone call away. In the last 6 months, I cannot tell you how wonderful it is for the first time to have aide come to Deb instead of taking Deb to them. They have brought the common home medical tools we need to make Deb more comfortable during this phase of her journey.

Because of her overall weakness, Deb has not been able to go up/down our stairs so we spend more time with her in our master bedroom where she continues to be so peaceful in the comfort of our home sweet home. With obvious reasons, Deb continues to stay with her personal bed nest in place of a hospital style bed that continues to be offered to us. The wonderful sitting room that the Crosses included in our original house design has made all the difference now for everyone to visit with Deb without feeling like we are smothering her.

Deb continues to be around 100lbs even though Bonnie has her consistently eating her 3 meals a day. We are seeing more confusion with Deb in the early morning and then she gets better throughout the day. Her pain med (oxy) intake has gone up so she is taking 1-2 doses nightly and in the morning. She continues to experience abdominal swelling which is common with liver cancer but currently not a risk. Because she is too weak to travel, we will continue to measure the swelling and if necessary, I will take her back to Northside for fluid drain if it becomes unbearable. Unfortunately, this is a procedure that cannot be done at the house. She can walk short distances including to/from the bathroom but we are right there to assist in case she seems “wobbly”. She can stay up 2-3 times a day for only a short period of time before she wants to go back to sleep.

With all of this said about Deb’s current state, she continues to amaze all of us how she can for the last 6 months of her life journey be so selfless with a never ending fire in her eyes that is constantly fighting for her independence so that she feels that she is not a burden to us. Deb’s strength has been rock solid with no feeling of being “needy” to her family. Those of you that know Deb well or have worked with her know that this is just the way she is and as a teacher, she continues to teach us.

The friend/family network strength continues to be strong and my family continues to be so grateful to all of Deb’s Life Angels out there for food and comfort so that Deb can be where she will always be most at peace in her continued life journey…. home sweet home.

KTS and Love to all,
Rod

I knew our joy would fill the earth and last till the end of time my love
Roberta Flack

To the Keheley Family

Deb and my family would like to sincerely thank all of you in the Keheley family for the beautiful wooden box over filled with cards of heartfelt love from everyone. Every card brings new strength to Deb! The engraving on top of the box was so touching and I cannot put to words how proud I am to be married to a teacher.

Over the last 19 years , I have had the true honor to witness first hand the precious gift of teaching from Deb and all of her elementary school families from Florida, Hawaii, and Georgia.

My deepest admiration is with all of you for the positive changes and everlasting inspirational happiness you change forever in children’s lives.

KTS and we love you Keheley,

Rod and Deb

Your the biggest part of me
Ambrosia

2nd Paracentesis, MRIs, and CTScan Completed

Deb had her paracentesis (abdominal fluid drain) Wednesday morning at 11am at Northside. They drained an amazing 5 litres which was twice the amount from last time. They also did a blood test ahead of time to be sure her levels were ok to handle the procedure. Results showed HGB at 10.6(L), HCT at 36.0(L), Platelet @ 497(H). When I went into the recovery room to get Deb, I could immediately tell that she was very pale in the face as result of the fluid drain. The nurse simply said that she removed as much as she could so Deb would not have to have the procedure for awhile. She sucked her dry!!!!! I then began to wonder if she took into account how weak and frail Deb was going into this procedure. Another lesson learned for next time…. Deb was very light headed when I was taking her to car in her wheelchair and I had to stop a couple times in hospital so she could drink some more water. She did great at home with her Mom Bonnie drinking plenty of fluids to replenish her body and definitely feels much relief in her abdomen. She slept fairly well last night and was able to get up by herself in the night without my help.

Overall, the procedure was a success and hopefully will be a while before this will have to be done again. We now have completed all the planned testing/procedures scheduled thru Dr. Yaffe for January (MRIs, CTScan, Paracentesis) and are still waiting results from MRIs and CTScans. Deb is now in a rebuilding phase for the next several months with our goal to build up her strength, weight, and energy levels.

To all of you,
It is important to us to remind you from time to time how much you have helped Deb maintain her quality of life at home with all the continued calls, cards and of course scrumptious weekly Highlander and Keheley meals! Please know that you all have added much love and care to Deb during her new journey in life. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for being part of the Deb’s extended family. I cannot tell you enough on how much difference your love and care for Deb has been wonderful medicine to keep her strong thru her daily journey.

KTS and love to all,
Rod

We love our bracelets and surprises Paige, Ingrid and Paul. Thank you!

The only thing I hear is the beating of your heart

Faith Hill

January Checkpoint with Dr. Yaffe

It was a productive but tiring day for Deb. Deb, Bonnie, and I were able to "piggy back" first 2009 checkpoint appointment with Dr. Yaffe after Deb’s biweekly Sandostatin injection/lab test today. After doing Deb’s routine checkup, Dr. Yaffe has recommended/scheduled the following for first quarter 2009:

(01/07) Lab Test : Routine blood work to review current hormone, calcium, blood levels. Results show Calcium @ 11.8 (H). Blood shows HGB @ 11.8 (L), HCT @ 35.4 (L) which are both a little low but thankfully not low enough to being anemic and warrant needing a blood transfusion.

(01/09, 630pm) MRI – Brain : Follow up scan on brain hematoma possibly caused from 12/04 hospital bed fall

(01/14, 9am) Paracentesis : Second ultrasound guided abdominal fluid drain @ Northside due to current abdominal bloating.

(Scheduling) CTScan - Abdominal: Follow up abdominal scan to measure progress as a result of second chemo embo treatment on 12/04.

(Scheduling) MRI Neck/Back : Precautionary MRI due to new pain Deb is feeling in her neck and lower back.

(Scheduling) Hospice Consult : Consultation only visit to understand what services are offered for hospice versus home health care in the event that Deb will need full time care giving later on in her journey.

Beyond the above tests ordered, we also talked about further 2009 treatment options for Deb which most likely would involve a full body chemo treatment unlike the isolated chemo embo treatment to the liver. Because Deb’s overall state is weak and currently frail, Dr. Yaffe does not want to recommend further treatments at this time. These new treatments will require additional strength and we will just have to continue to help rebuild Deb one day at a time. We will revisit again at end of first quarter 2009 or earlier if Deb's strength improves greatly. This is not the best news to report but our strength is strong. We continue to keep hope alive while Deb rests comfortably in our home every day. Good night beautiful!

KTS and love to all,
Rod

Every little thing she does is magic
The Police

Happiest of Holidays

On behalf of Deb, Taylor, Tommy and myself, happiest of holidays! My apologies in advance for not being able to personally thank each of you during the holidays for the continued support to Deb and my family. All the holiday treats and goodies were wonderful! Please continue to know that your thoughtfulness continues to make the difference in Deb’s quality of life. T H A N K Y O U !!!!!

It has been approximately 4.5 weeks since Deb’s second chemoembolization of left liver lobe. Her post recovery has been very similar to recovery after first treatment. Deb’s appetite has been good but she was down to 100 pounds a little over a week ago. She is slowly gaining weight back but is very weak due to a lot of muscle loss. By the way, I was getting some very strange looks from employees at Kohls yesterday when I asked where to find the junior girls underwear. For the most part, she is able to sleep thru the entire night and not have to get up much like she has had to do in the past. Deb is sleeping more frequently throughout the day and is only able to stay up for 1-2 hours in between naps. Fortunately, Deb’s mental state during the post recovery has been consistently at her baseline which is comfort to us all. Her pain level has still been under control but continued daily discomfort with her whole abdomen area. For her pain, Deb is is currently taking 2 Oxycodone at night and 2 in the morning.

Deb also has not lost much hair with makes her continue to feel good about herself. Overall, Deb is still in her rebuilding stage as before with first treatment which took a solid 5 weeks. If there is any pattern to these post recovery treatments, I hope that Deb’s overall quality of life will be back to her near baseline by end of next week.

Because of her weakness, Bonnie (Deb’s Mom) and I help her up and down the stairs. It takes everything out of her on the stairs but it is much needed exercise and Deb does great putting everything into it. I have also converted the office downstairs to another bedroom so she can take naps downstairs during the day and not have to deal with the stairs. When not to cold, we try to get Deb out of the house just to keep her engaged and every little bit makes a difference in her overall state.

I was so pleased that Deb was able to participate and enjoy the Christmas holidays with all of her family at our house. There was enjoyment by all and a truly special time for everyone. We had so many wonderful treats and goodies from friends and family that added to the magic of Christmas. Thank you all again and feel bad that I couldn’t get the xmas cards out this year.

Deb’s next steps in her plan are biweekly Sandostatin shot this Wednesday and follow up brain MRI this Thursday to check status of hematoma from possible hospital bed fall back in early December. We do not yet have follow up CTScan setup to check the status of the second chemboembolization. We will not yet know next phase of Deb’s treatment plan until we meet with Dr. Yaffe in late January. At this time, we will discuss her Parathyroid gland surgery that we postponed in November due to Deb’s decreased strength.

Thank you Bonnie for staying with us during Deb’s post recovery and your endless love and caring for Deb. I am forever grateful to you and peace of mind that I can return to work during these challenging times.

Happy New Year, Love to all and KTS!

Rod

I believe in the power of love

Luther Vandross